


brand new eyes

by loveletterd



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: 2000s, Best Friends, Coming Out, Denial of Feelings, Feelings Realization, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Mark Lee (NCT) is Whipped, Mark is confused, Mild Angst, Polyamory, Skateboarding, Teen Angst, Things get messy, Underage Drinking, teenagers being teenagers, too many paramore references
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-27
Updated: 2020-03-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:08:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23336635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loveletterd/pseuds/loveletterd
Summary: As he listens to her sing about wanting to find perfection in her pride, he thinks about how much Donghyuck loves this song, and all the times he’s watched the boy try to hit the highest notes as he’s driving too fast and the wind is blowing his hair everywhere.Mark thinks that now, he would want to kiss him in that moment
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee/Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas, Mark Lee/Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas
Comments: 11
Kudos: 198





	brand new eyes

**Author's Note:**

> this is a big experiment and the style is really messy but i promise it's intentional !!! i've been dying to write something like this so i hope it's not too confusing or weird haha.  
> and thank you to moonbboom for commissioning this piece and giving me so much freedom because i had a lot of fun writing this!!! :] <3

Mark’s mother tells him that he shouldn’t pick his nails so much. She tells him he shouldn’t listen to his music so loud, and he shouldn’t stay up too late, and he shouldn’t skateboard without a helmet. Mark usually responds by telling her that he could be doing crack or something instead, and it usually shuts her up long enough for his dad to change the subject and save his ass.

(Mark’s mother also tells him that his eyes are too big, and his limbs are gangly, and he shouldn’t wear cargo pants because they aren’t the slightest bit flattering. He tries his best not to take her words to heart.)

Most of the time, he chooses to ignore her suggestions because all she ever wants to do is change him into someone she deems perfect. Right now, however, he is beginning to wish he listened to her for once because his fingers are throbbing and bleeding from the senseless torture he inflicts upon himself whenever he’s nervous. 

He continuously wipes them on his pants, grateful that they’re black as it hides any stains it might cause, while waiting for his math teacher to hand back his test. He keeps his eyes fixated on his worn-out Vans that his dad got him for his birthday, high topped and colour blocked red and blue. They bounce against the tiled floor, all scuffed up and stained with dirt, replacing the nail picking for the time being. 

As the teacher breezes past and places a paper face down on his desk, he figures he’s going to receive yet another lecture from his mother. Something along the lines of him needing to study more, or try harder, or at least give a shit about school. He lifts the paper and much to his surprise reveals a bright red 70%. B-, in other terms, and Mark feels like God has blessed him. 

A scuffed-up Doc Marten kicks his shin, and he looks up to meet the rounded eyes of his best friend Lee Donghyuck. He leans over in his desk, lips quirked in a lopsided smile as he tries to sneak a peek at Mark’s test paper. 

Mark always thought Donghyuck was a nosy motherfucker. Him and his round eyes and eyebrow slit and torn up denim jacket are always butting into things that didn’t involve him, and though it pisses him off to no end, he knows Donghyuck’s pestering was responsible for the two of them meeting. 

Mark was at the skatepark, sitting on his board and scooting side to side while he sipped a blue raspberry Slurpee and watched a little kid completely wipe out on his scooter. From beside him came a snorted laugh and he looked over to see a boy with short, messy orange hair and too much eyeshadow watching the scene with an amused smile on his face. 

Mark rolled his eyes and went back to his drink, but the boy caught him first.

“What are you staring at?” His voice was a little nasally, and Mark wasn’t about to give him the time of day. 

Boots clunked against the pavement before black skinny jeans came into view, and the boy was sitting himself down next to Mark. He glanced over at him, long fingers dragging through choppy bangs before he nudged Mark with his elbow.

“If you don’t laugh at kids falling, what the hell are you doing here?” 

Mark quirked up a brow and pulled his straw from his mouth. “Skating? What the fuck are you doing here?” 

The boy with no board in sight smiled smugly and stated. “Picking up girls.” 

Mark, though thoroughly annoyed, didn’t move from his spot. The boy—later learned to be named Donghyuck—leaned over and examined Mark’s drink.

“Cherry is better.” 

From that moment on, the pair became inseparable. It took a while for Mark to get used to his peskiness, but once he decided he loved Donghyuck’s entire personality and that he was funny as fuck, he earned a best friend. 

“Did you pass?” Donghyuck reaches over a hand, nails neatly kept but coated in chipped black polish, and snatches the paper. 

“Fuck yeah I did.” Mark sneers back, watching the boy hold the paper in front of himself before scoffing and slapping it back on his desk. 

“My dad is gonna kill me.” Donghyuck groans with a half-hearted laugh, sliding his hands into his choppy hair and tugging on it just slightly. 

Mark thinks Donghyuck’s haircut is stupid. He did it himself on a Friday night when Mark’s parents were fighting and he decided to call Donghyuck while mindlessly sketching in his notebook instead of doing his homework. Donghyuck didn’t ask why Mark called—he never did—just indulged the boy in pointless conversation while he stood in front of his bathroom mirror and took the scissors to his overgrown hair.

Mark could hear the snip of the scissors, and he was positive Donghyuck could hear the muffled yelling coming from downstairs, but neither asked about it. Mark came to school on Monday and pretended as if nothing had happened, and Donghyuck showed up with a shitty half mullet, the ends bleached unevenly. It was so stupid, and Mark was angry that it somehow looked good on him.

Everything looked good on Donghyuck, from his stupid haircut to his torn up skinny jeans, he made anything he wanted to work, work. 

“What did you get?” Mark stares proudly at his grade as Donghyuck huffs out a breath and knocks his heel off the ground.

“50.” 

“You passed!” 

“Barely.” He laughs, before sticking his test into his black backpack covered in pins and buttons, inevitably attempting to lose it within its mess of papers and books. “Can I come over after school? Or can we go skate or something? I just gotta clear my head before I get hell from anyone.” 

“Sure dude.” 

Mark is completely a pushover when it comes to Donghyuck. Whether he wants to or not, he always does whatever the boy tells him to. Mark got drunk for the first time in Donghyuck’s basement, he got high in his shitty car parked in the school lot on a Saturday night, and more recently, let him bleach a few strands of his bangs in his dad’s tiny bathroom. 

Mark thinks he’d go with Donghyuck to the ends of the earth, and while the idea of being so dependent on another person scares the absolute shit out of him, he embraces the fact that he’s found another person he clicks so well with, especially since he’s always just been, Mark. 

Where Donghyuck is an effortless cool despite his oddities and questionable appearance choices, Mark is just odd. He’s lanky and wears baggy clothes and has features that remind himself somewhat of a less exaggerated Tim Burton character. Where Donghyuck has tanned skin and freckles, a plethora of cool interests, and a desire for adventure, Mark always feels like he can’t measure up. 

He’s just unwashed, overgrown hair and bleeding fingernails. He doesn’t understand what Donghyuck sees in him as a friend, and he knows for a goddamn fact that he would never see him as anything more. 

He always seems to think this way, ever since their sophomore year when Donghyuck came out. He was the only boy in their grade—maybe the whole school—to announce that he liked boys. Both, he had told Mark. 

He’s into both. 

Mark had laughed, told Donghyuck that was cool, that if girls could be hot then why not guys? And Donghyuck had laughed back and thanked Mark for being totally calm about the situation when other dudes would have called him a bunch of shitty names. 

Mark didn’t care what Donghyuck was or who he was into, as long as he always liked Mark. Not like that, of course, because Mark wasn’t into boys. Or girls really. Mark never really paid attention to what he liked, because it had never really mattered before. 

Now, Mark is becoming conflicted. 

“Dude,” Donghyuck starts as they’re walking out of the school at the end of the day, his skateboard under his arm. “I met the most attractive boy I’ve ever seen on the weekend.” 

“Oh yeah?” Mark tries to sound interested, but the thought of Donghyuck’s attention being on anyone else makes him feel oddly sick.

It’s selfish, but he can’t help it. 

“He works at Hot Topic. He’s real tall and has his lip pierced and wears a lot of chains on his belt.” 

“Cool,” 

“I think he’s into Paramore,” 

“Hm,” Mark lets his mind drift, past the thought of jealousy. He doesn’t need to be jealous of Donghyuck having a crush on some Hot Topic employee with piercings. He doesn’t like Donghyuck. He can’t be gay, because he likes girls, right? He thinks for a moment—Hayley Williams is pretty, isn’t she? Definitely. But does Mark really…care? 

“Hey dumbfuck.” A hand hits the back of his head and he’s startled from his thoughts by an annoyed Donghyuck. “You totally zoned out while I was talking.”

“Sorry.”

“Ass.” Donghyuck pulls out a cigarette from his jacket pocket and sticks it between his lips, not lighting it as they walk towards the park. “At least pretend to be interested.” 

“Sorry dude,” Mark sighs, scratching the side of his head and trying to focus his attention. “Tell me about Hot Topic guy,” 

Enter: Lucas Wong. 

When Donghyuck drags Mark to Hot Topic on the following Friday night, he completely understands Donghyuck’s infatuation. Standing by the display of bracelets is a ridiculously tall, ridiculously attractive boy wearing tight black and white striped pants that are in fact adorned with a set of chains. 

Mark stops in the doorway as Donghyuck immediately ventures over to the t-shirts, and takes in the sight of his friend’s crush. His eyes are big (almost like Mark’s own) and they’re lined with smoky makeup that’s tastefully messy. His hair is a little overgrown for the cut he has, bangs ticking his eyes, and his lips are plump and soft looking—even from a distance. 

Mark has never looked at a boy this way before. 

“Hey! Button boy!” A deep voice is produced from those lips as the boy notices Donghyuck, and Mark watches the way his normally hardened and confident friend turns to a mushy puddle on the tile floor. 

“Hi.” His cheeks go red, and Mark can assume the nickname came from his love of buttons and the need to buy an ungodly amount whenever he’s at the store. 

“You brought a friend today.” 

Suddenly both sets of eyes are on Mark. He raises a hand and waves awkwardly, but Donghyuck barely acknowledges it, just goes back to focusing on the employee. 

“That’s just Mark.” He says simply, and Mark feels a gross twisting in his stomach. 

Just Mark. He’s always been just Mark, but something about this situation hurts so much more than usual. He isn’t sure if it’s the idea of Donghyuck, his best friend, seeing him as nothing more than Just Mark, or if it’s thought of a cool and handsome stranger knowing him as that.

“Hi, Mark. I’m Lucas.” The boy steps closer and outstretches a hand, and Mark finds himself self-conscious of his fingernails as he slips his into it, hyper-aware of how chewed and frankly gross they are. “Donghyuck mentioned you. From what I hear you’re pretty special.” 

A wink is thrown his way before Lucas turns back around, leaving Mark to wonder what the fuck that means. 

After that, Mark sees a lot more of Lucas Wong than he’d like to.

Something about the boy unlocks a frustration in Mark and he can’t quite pinpoint why. He starts showing up to lunch at school in a beat-up Toyota Camry, bringing Donghyuck a soda from the mall. He always offered to bring something for Mark, but he awkwardly refuses to accept every time.

They’d sit in his car, Donghyuck in the passenger seat and Mark in the back, and listen to scratched up Blink-182 CDs on the shitty stereo while eating. Donghyuck always sang along, and Lucas would tell him his voice was heavenly—something Mark agreed with but was always too scared to say. 

Mark’s frustration stems from jealousy, but he doesn’t quite understand why. He thinks he might be jealous that Donghyuck’s attention is stolen by Lucas, or that Lucas is giving all of his attention to Donghyuck. Mark doesn’t know how he feels about Lucas Wong. All he knows is that he doesn’t like his fixation on Donghyuck. 

It reaches a tipping point one night, when they’re sitting in the basement at Donghyuck’s dad’s house, passing Lucas’ bong around while a My Chemical Romance CD plays quietly. 

It’s a Thursday, and Donghyuck had invited Mark over to hang, promising he’d have some weed for them for the first time in months. Mark’s mother always told him not to even try drugs, but Mark is far from a pothead like some of the other kids in his school. 

Donghyuck’s basement is cramped and smells a little like mildew, but it has the comfiest couch in the world and Mark immediately sinks into it when he arrives, shifting to adjust the chains he attached to his checkerboard belt. He’s never worn them before but seeing Lucas wear them persuaded him to buy a set. He’s finding it difficult to have something looped around his ass all the time, but the approval he got from Donghyuck the first time he wore them stopped him from tossing them somewhere in his room to get lost. 

“Here.” Donghyuck tosses a bottle at him, hitting his stomach and evoking a grunt before Mark picks it up and reads the label. 

It’s some kind of fruit flavoured vodka, and he gives Donghyuck a look as he unscrews the cap. 

“Found it under the backseat of Mom’s car when I went to visit. She probably didn’t even know she had it.” He explains with a wave of his hand before slumping down on the couch beside Mark. 

As Mark is bringing the bottle to his lips, his eyes fall to Donghyuck’s legs, which are clad in his staple black skinny jeans that are too tight around his thighs for comfort. He watches the way they stretch out the already worn material, and as the boy’s hand settles on one and rubs over it a few times, Mark has to choke back a swallow of the alcohol.

Donghyuck doesn’t say anything, just laughs tauntingly and snatches the bottle back, bringing it to his own lips. Mark keeps his eyes fixated on a stack of old board games sitting in the corner of the room, the boxes clearly water damaged. 

After about 10 minutes of silence while the boys pass the bottle and forth and Mark internally freaks the fuck out over his friend’s leg for some reason, the door to the basement opens. Lucas Wong strolls into the room, all long-legged and handsome, and Mark feels his blood boil. 

“What are you doing here?” 

“Lucas brought the weed, dude.”

Mark realizes that he should have guessed that, as Lucas is the only one out of the three of them to have a job. 

“Make room, dicks.” Lucas snickers before forcing himself between Mark and Donghyuck on the couch. 

Mark wants to protest, tell him to sit somewhere else, but as a ridiculously large hand settles over his thigh he falls completely silent, his words catching in his throat. Lucas barely says anything to him as he pulls a bong out of his backpack. Mark sits in anxious silence, his fingers falling victim to his teeth as he listens to Donghyuck and Lucas talk about school. 

The bong gets passed around the three of them a few times, and Mark keeps his mouth shut long after Lucas’ hand moves from his thigh to Donghyuck’s hair. He twists a bleached end around his finger as Mark takes another hit, awkwardly sitting at the end of the couch while the two boys wrap themselves up in each other. 

He never touches Donghyuck like that. It’s forbidden, as Mark always thought you had to be like Donghyuck to touch another boy like that. You had to like boys, to get that close and be so gentle.

Mark’s mother always tells him that she hopes he turns out normal—not like Donghyuck. 

Lucas’ hand covers Donghyuck’s soft cheek, and they lean in closer until their lips are meeting. It’s slow but it’s deep, and Donghyuck lifts himself off the couch to push his body closer to Lucas’. 

Mark forces himself to swallow back more vodka as his friend is lifted onto the boy’s thigh, his hands sliding into his hair as large ones grip his hips. The sound of their mouths moving together, slick with spit, is too loud for Mark’s liking. 

As he’s setting the bottle on the table he hears Donghyuck moan, all soft and airy and high, and his stomach tightens so painfully that he’s almost positive he’s going to throw up. He shoves off the couch in a second and in his intoxicated haze, he isn’t sure if he drank too much, took one too many hits, or if a combination of the two is making him feel sick. 

He just knows that he doesn’t want to be in the basement with the two of them all over each other any longer.

Donghyuck pushes off of Lucas quickly as Mark is throwing his hoodie over his head and racing for the stairs, and he can’t even get a word out before Mark is slamming the door to the basement and leaving the two to themselves. 

He doesn’t go home right away. He can’t because he needs to let his high wear off a little before he risks facing his family. He can mask drunk but he can’t mask high, and his mom always has a close eye on him whenever he comes home from being with Donghyuck.

He takes his skateboard from the front hallway and only gets to the end of the driveway before he’s sitting down on the dampened grass and kicking his board over on the pavement so the wheels face the night sky. Mark lets his back hit the ground and his eyes land on the stars, his head spinning a little at the number of white freckles that sit in the sky. 

The front door doesn’t open, and no one comes outside to look for him, and Mark just lays in Donghyuck’s front yard trying to ignore the fact that he’s half hard. 

He doesn’t know how long he stays there, but at some point he gets up, his shirt sticking to his back, and picks up his board so he can walk home. His parents are asleep when he lets himself in and the house is dark. They’ve long stopped waiting up for Mark if he’s out at night, and he’s kind of grateful right now because he feels a little unsteady in his movements and his clothes are still uncomfortably damp. To make matters worse, the thought of Donghyuck all over Lucas wouldn’t leave his brain the entire way home, and he’s definitely still hard. 

He tosses his skateboard down in the front hallway and kicks off his shoes before trudging upstairs and into his bedroom. On his nightstand sits his little blue Nokia, and he only then realizes that he forgot to bring it with him. 

He shuts his door and picks it up, seeing text messages from both Donghyuck and Lucas. 

Donghyuck asks him where he went, if he was sick and if he was coming back. Lucas’ read more angrily, telling him that he had upset Donghyuck and he could at least text him back. 

Mark doesn’t; he just inappropriately thinks of his two friends kissing until he falls asleep with nothing but that thought on his brain, big hands and soft lips all over warm, honey skin. Mark wakes the next morning with nothing but shame and wet underwear.

He talks to his dad at breakfast long after his mother has disappeared to shower, and asks him with practised nonchalance, “What if I was like Donghyuck?” 

That thought hasn’t left his brain either, and he feels like it might be eating it alive from inside his skull. 

“I don’t think a mullet would suit you, kiddo.” His dad tells him over the newspaper, not even bothering to glance up. “Your mom would hate that.”

Mark rolls his eyes and stuffs a mouthful of sugary cereal into his mouth before daring to push a little harder. “No, dad. What if I liked what he liked?” 

“What does he like?” 

“Boys.”

A pair of eyes drift to him finally, and the newspaper is folded up slowly. “Why do you ask that?”

Mark shrugs, training his eyes on his spoon as it swishes around in the remaining milk. “I dunno. He’s just...got a boyfriend or something and it’s kinda weird for me...so it must be weird for everyone else. So I was just wondering what it would be like if that was...me.”

Mark isn’t completely lying—he feels fucking weird whenever he sees Donghyuck and Lucas together—but his dad seems to see past his awkward rambling and shitty excuses. He was always smart, always paid a little more attention to Mark than his mother would, and he can read him so irritatingly well. 

He tells him very sincerely, “If you were… like Donghyuck…I think that would be okay.” 

He goes on to explain that his mother would find it weird, but she just isn’t used to it. He tells him that he has a co-worker who’s gay, and he’s just like the rest of them except for the fact that he likes men instead of women. He tells Mark that if he was like that, he’d still be himself. He’d just like boys instead of girls. 

Mark leaves the table feeling sick to his stomach again, this time with clarity instead of confusion.

When he sees Donghyuck in class that day, neither of them speak. It’s petty and it’s childish but Mark feels too awkward to say a word after the previous night’s debacle. He glances at him a few times, and his eyes are drawn to the bruises littering his collar and peeking out from his shirt. An array of blues and purples that Mark thinks looks really fucking good against his warm skin. 

Donghyuck only shoots him a glare. 

It leaves him dejected, regretful that his own internal conflicts caused such a ripple in their friendship. He shouldn’t have left like that, and he certainly shouldn’t have ignored his texts, but Mark was coming to a realization that night and it was overwhelming for his poor teenage brain. 

He liked what he saw. 

It didn’t make him sick because he was disgusted, or uncomfortable. It made him feel that way because he liked how it looked and he really wished it was him. 

In whose place, he isn’t sure yet. Lucas is undoubtedly hot as fuck, and the idea of his hands all over Mark is intoxicating, but so is Donghyuck’s entire self (and the thought of leaving hickies across his skin). 

Mark has learned that the way he looked at Donghyuck their entire friendship has been different than what it should be. Donghyuck could only pull off anything because Mark found him so attractive that he was blinded. Mullets aren’t something that people look hot with, but Donghyuck is another story. 

Mark likes him—and hell, maybe he likes Lucas too. If he likes boys, why not fall for all of them? Right?

The only problem is that they like each other, and Mark has sent an arrow right through the shoulder blades of his relationship with his friends. 

He doesn’t see Donghyuck or hear from him for the entire weekend, and it’s the longest the pair has gone without speaking since they met. Mark hadn’t expected it to hurt so much. 

Yes, he and Donghyuck did everything together, from cutting each other’s hair in his bathtub to getting drunk after Donghyuck’s parents split and his mother moved away—but that doesn’t mean they’re dependent on each other. 

He had figured that if he somehow lost Donghyuck, that he could move on easily. Now that romantic feelings have been thrown into the mix there’s absolutely no way Mark can handle so much time apart. And Lucas—even though he’s new to their dynamic and hasn’t been through nearly as much as Donghyuck has with him—he cared so much for Mark right from the start that it hurts to not have that comforting presence just a text away. 

Mark wonders if Lucas meant it when he told him that Donghyuck made him sound special. Mark wonders if he is special—or at least more than Just Mark to either of them. 

When Donghyuck contacts him, it’s a week later. 

It’s Saturday, and it’s a colder day than usual, and Mark is listening to Donghyuck’s favourite Paramore album on his shitty radio. 

He still doesn’t know all the words to the boy’s favourite song, but he knows what it is and that counts for something, right? 

Mark thinks Donghyuck is a lot like Hayley Williams. He’s bold, he’s unapologetic, and he’s fucking kick ass. He wonders if maybe that’s why he likes her so much—because she reminds him of the boy who has him so infatuated that it hurts. 

As he listens to her sing about wanting to find perfection in her pride, he thinks about how much Donghyuck loves this song, and all the times he’s watched the boy try to hit the highest notes in the bridge as he’s driving too fast and the wind is blowing his hair everywhere. 

Mark thinks that now, he would want to kiss him at that moment. 

As if by magic, his phone makes noise while he’s laying on his bed and facing the ceiling. He scrambles up and grabs it to see a text from “Hyuck :P” sitting on the screen. 

It reads, “meet me by the school pls” 

Mark types back, “right now”. 

As soon as a “yea” appears he’s launching to his feet and not even bothering to turn off his radio before he’s racing out of his bedroom and stumbling down the stairs. 

His mother watches him go, calling to him about how he shouldn’t run in the house and he needs to wear a coat and Mark just doesn’t care. 

He isn’t going to listen to his mother—or anyone for that matter—telling him what he should be doing. He’s going to do what he wants, ignoring the normal and abnormal and the do’s and don’ts, and what he wants is to tell Donghyuck and Lucas how he feels. 

He’s on his board on the road in no time, and he can hear his mother’s voice scolding him for not wearing a helmet. The sky is grey above him and he knows it’s going to rain, but he hopes it holds off until he gets back home because he hates riding in the rain. 

When he reaches the street his high school is on, he can see a boy sitting on the curb with long legs outstretched into the street. A familiar pair of worn Doc Martens drag back and forth across the pavement, and Mark wants to slap Donghyuck for being so careless with such expensive shoes. 

He doesn’t, just pushes a little harder to pick up speed, and the sound of his wheels on uneven pavement alerts his friend. 

Unexpectedly, Donghyuck shoves to his feet and his face twists up in anger. 

“Hey asshole!” 

Mark, caught quite off guard, tries to come to a stop but ends up launching off of his board and stumbling to keep his balance as it rolls in the other direction. Before he can fall forwards and probably smash up his face for what wouldn’t be the first time, a pair of aggressive hands slam onto his chest and push him back. 

“What the fuck?” He snarls, slapping Donghyuck’s hands away only to get pushed back again. 

“What is wrong with you?” Donghyuck’s brows are lowered to a glare that Mark has seen before but never directed at him. “You fucking ass!” 

“Huh?” 

“Listen, dude,” Donghyuck sneers. “If you don’t like me the way I am, or you think I’m gross, or I make you uncomfortable, I don’t give a fuck. Just tell me so I can get rid of my goddamn stupid feelings!” 

Mark stumbles back, the hands on his chest hot like fire. He shakes his head quickly but doesn’t speak, not quite processing what Donghyuck has just said. In his head, he practiced how to say something meaningful, something that truly reflects how he feels, but it doesn’t quite come out that way. 

“I like boys too, you dick!” 

Donghyuck goes entirely frozen aside from his hands, which curl into fists around Mark’s shirt almost immediately. His eyes are widened, searching Mark’s face rapidly as if looking for any sign of insincerity. 

Mark swallows hard, shaking his head slowly this time as he feels Donghyuck’s grip loosening. 

“You let me think that you hated me.” He whispers, and Mark lets out a choked noise in protest. 

“God, no. I was just scared out of my fucking mind.” He admits, and suddenly it feels like there are no walls surrounding him anymore. “You—you always made me feel so weird, and I thought it was jealousy or something because you were so much cooler and better looking than me. But then Lucas came into the picture and I felt that same thing and—”

“You like us.” 

“I…I guess?” Mark lets out a nervous laugh, and Donghyuck’s hands slide over his shoulders instead, pulling him into a hug that’s mildly awkward. 

Mark and Donghyuck don’t really hug. They have a few times, like when Donghyuck told him about his parents or the first time after Mark experienced an argument between his own, but other than that their physical contact is less than gentle. 

This feels different, but it also feels really, really right. 

“You idiot,” Donghyuck mumbles into his neck as Mark tries to figure out what to do with his hands. He settles them on the small of Donghyuck’s back, and that feels even better. “I’ve always liked you.”

“Huh?” 

“You were the reason I knew I liked boys.” He doesn’t pull away, but Mark doesn’t really want to. “I saw you at that skatepark and I couldn’t help myself. God, why do you think I talked so much about you to Lucas?” 

“But—but what about him?” Mark dares to ask. 

“Fuck, dude.” Donghyuck finally breaks away from him with a laugh, and his wide eyes look a little glossier than before. “I like him too.”

“Oh.” 

“You know, I figure if I can like boys, why can’t I like more than one at the same time?” 

“You—wait we can—that’s allowed?” 

“I don’t fucking know!” Donghyuck laughs again, and Mark doesn’t fear the fluttering in his stomach that comes with it this time. “Does it matter?”

Mark takes a moment to think. If his mother were here, she’d say absolutely yes. Hell, if anyone else were here they’d say yes—he shouldn’t like any boys at all let alone two. But Mark disregards that. 

“Fuck no.” 

“That’s my boy.” Donghyuck slaps a hand on Mark’s back, and everything feels normal again. 

That is until Donghyuck comes back to Mark’s house, and they’re laying on his bed while Paramore plays in the background. The door is shut so the music can be a little louder, and Donghyuck’s head rests on one of Mark’s navy blue pillows. It’s started to rain, and it’s a gentle patter against Mark’s bedroom window which looks out at the darkened sky. 

Without warning, Donghyuck asks something that Mark never thought he would hear.

“Can I kiss you?” 

Mark looks up from his game boy, heart stuttering in his chest, and can’t find words. 

“Now?” 

Donghyuck snorts, fingers picking at a loose thread in the duvet. “No, tomorrow.” 

“I-I’ve never done that.”

“Bullshit.” Donghyuck shifts toward the end of the bed where Mark lays on his elbows and pulls the video game out of his hand. “You’re too pretty.”

Mark’s face goes so hot that he feels light-headed for a moment, and he immediately pushes up so he’s sitting. Donghyuck’s voice speaking to him in such a way makes something strange build up in his stomach, and he shakes his head. 

“Swear to god,”

“Jesus,” Donghyuck mutters under his breath. “So can I?” 

Mark knows he probably should let anything happen when his family is essentially just a closed door away, but he finds himself nodding rapidly as the heat in his face only intensifies. 

The next thing he knows, Donghyuck is sliding a hand over his cheek and brushing the prominent bone with his thumb, a tiny smile on his pouty lips. 

“You sure?” 

“Since when do you care that much?” Mark laughs nervously, and Donghyuck’s other hand toys with his shirt. 

“Hey, you’ve gotta be comfortable or else it’s weird as fuck.” 

“I’m…cool.” Mark breathes out as Donghyuck’s fingers slip just beneath the hem, brushing over his side ever so lightly. “Really cool.”

“Sure you are, Mark.” Donghyuck teases before slotting his lips together with Mark’s tentatively. 

It still feels fucking weird, Mark thinks, to be kissing a boy. But Donghyuck is gentler than expected and he thinks he might just melt into the mattress. His hand latches onto the end of Donghyuck’s stupid haircut, and he pushes the boy back until he’s laying flat on the mattress and Mark is hovering over him. 

“Good?” Donghyuck breathes out, his thumb pressing against Mark’s bottom lip. 

“Perfect,” Mark chuckles, before kissing him again. 

Hands wander over skin as lips move together slowly, and somewhere in the process both boys lose their shirts as they fumble with this new territory atop Mark’s bed. Mark makes mental notes of the freckles on Donghyuck’s chest and stomach, mapping them out in his brain as places he’d like his lips to hit at some point. 

“You like this?” Donghyuck mutters, his fingers tight in Mark’s hair as lips slip down beneath his jaw. 

“Nosy motherfucker,” Mark grunts before attaching his mouth to warm skin, experimenting with slight pressure. 

Donghyuck stutters out a moan, and Mark’s heart soars. 

The next time he sees Lucas, it goes somewhat the same way. He hadn’t expected someone who looks like Lucas to have any interest in someone like him, with his big eyes and gangly limbs and untamed hair, but when he walks into Donghyuck’s basement with a bowl of popcorn in hand, ready to watch a movie, Lucas proves him wrong. 

He sets down the bowl on the table before fingers hook into his belt loop and pull him up and closer to a tall body. He swallows hard as he locks eyes with Lucas, who pulls his bottom lip between his teeth before playing with the little hoop that hangs from it. 

“So, Donghyuck said you’re into me.” 

“He did?” Mark squeaks, knowing full well Donghyuck and his big mouth definitely did say something to Lucas. 

“Don’t worry,” Lucas hums, his hands settling on Mark’s waist. “Feeling’s mutual.”

Mark breathes out a laugh, feeling Lucas toying with his chains as he just stares down at him, puppy dog eyes lined with a smudged deep purple. 

“Don’t think I didn’t notice the way you looked at me when you first saw me.” His smile is teasing, and Mark feels his whole body getting warmer by the second. “And Donghyuck told me you were hot, but I wasn’t expecting this.”

“Me?” Mark wonders aloud, earning a deep giggle. 

“Yeah, you.” Lucas fakes a pout, his hand sliding down Mark’s side until he’s practically cupping the back of his thigh with one of those massive hands that Mark had so shamefully imagined all over him. “Didn’t Donghyuck tell you I have a thing for boys who look like they haven’t slept in a century?” 

Mark lets out a laugh as both of them are leaning closer until his breath feels like it’s mixing with Lucas’. 

“He must have left that part out.” 

Lucas barely laughs before kissing him, and Mark’s whole body erupts with the same heat that he hasn’t had a chance to get accustomed to yet. 

Before he can get too comfortable in Lucas’ hold, a shout sounds from the top of the basement stairs. He pulls away so fast that it makes him dizzy, only to see Donghyuck standing there with a clearly fake look of shock on his pretty face. 

“Asshole! You were supposed to wait until I was here to see it!” He whines before trudging down the stairs.

“Creep.” Lucas sneers, before flicking his thumb over Mark’s lip and winking, much like he did the day he met him. 

The butterflies are back, but this time they feel right, and for once Mark knows that he’s doing exactly what he should be.


End file.
